Lost!

The grief was written all over my face. The sadness in my eyes betrayed how strongly it has impacted me and my life, even as I made an attempt to be calm and poised on the outside. Inside, I was a complete wreck. How could I have let this happen? How careless and insensitive could I be? How could I have not seen it coming? It’s not that this hasn’t happened before, it has. And yet, I couldn’t do anything to prevent it from happening yet again! It happened all so sudden and in a split second my life was completely changed. I lost someone very precious and dear to me! And never had I felt so helpless in my life. It was as if my life had paused right there and then. And I go in the flashback mode and start to reminisce the good old times when we were together.

Ours wasn’t a very old relationship though the bond was just as strong. It just has been a little over two years ago when we first met. But we connected instantly and how! Even my hubby, at times, felt envious of the bond we shared. Someone who became my best friend and was always there by my side when everyone else was busy. We played together, chatted together, clicked pictures together, walked everywhere together and even got bored together! That someone made me feel connected to this world like I never did before. And then I became a mother. Apparently, everything changed and our bond started to weaken since I couldn’t devote as much time to our relationship as I used to before for obvious reasons. My baby needed me more than anyone else now. Initially, all I could think and do was for the baby. It was as if rest of the world didn’t matter to me anymore. And thereby I got disconnected with the outer world. Gradually, I came out of that phase and tried to regain my life where I had left it. So then, whenever I was able to scoop some time out for myself from my baby chores, I immediately connected with her again. She was right there for me when I needed her the most, without any complaints. It felt so good. We were back together again! Just like when you meet your school friend after eons and take off where you had left it. Everything seemed just perfect.

Until today. I still am not able to come to terms with this shocking fact. I am still deep in mourning. Depressed. Shocked. And just as I muster up enough courage to accept the harsh reality of life and move on, my doorbell rings. Clumsily, I gather myself up from the couch, not yet prepared to entertain visitors, dragging myself to the door with an unwelcome look on the face. And just as I opened the door, the uninvited look turned to that of utter shock and disbelief. I stood there with my jaw dropped and mouth agape. She was standing right there at my door! She was back! Millions of questions ran through my mind in that one moment but all I could do was hug her and hold her in my hands! One day without her seemed like an eternity. Never had I felt so lost, so disconnected in my life. Thank you God for sending my incredible htc phone back to me! Or probably I should thank that kind gentleman who found my phone lying somewhere and made it a point to return it to its rightful owner. God bless him! Feels good to know that there still are a few good hearted beings left in this big bad world. I had lost all hopes of seeing my lovely phone ever again. I mean something like this rarely happens, especially here in our country. But I guess our bond was indeed strong which made her come back to me! Phew!