Hit me baby one more time!

My new year resolution this year is a little different from any of the resolutions I ever had or will ever have. I had firmly resolved to have no resolutions this year but I am required to take this one resolution out of sheer necessity. So I hereby resolve to save myself from baby bashing! I’m sure all of you who read this will take it as I’m one mean mom who bashes her child all the time but the truth is exactly the opposite where the mom is being bashed by her child! How? You wonder. Well, read on to find out…

I’m sure most of you have seen the movie Baby’s day out. The initial reaction to the movie would be “Awww… such a cute adorable baby” and after watching the whole movie the reaction would be “Whoa! That is one hell of a superkid! Can a sweet adorable looking baby create such a havoc in an adult’s life and in this case not one but three hefty looking adults.. it is definitely a little over the top!”  

Life sometimes depicts a movie or is it the other way round? Well, either way this movie has suddenly come alive for me after all these years. And here the cute adorable baby is replaced by my little terror who is just as adorable as the baby in the movie. But as they say looks are deceptive so don’t fall for that cute curvy smile or the innocent look in her eyes. And the three hefty goons are replaced by only one now, namely MOM! And sometimes if dad is lucky (or unlucky?) enough to be her target. Yes, that’s me and my hubby who are no less than those goons in her life, according to her, mind you.

A normal day these days would start with a BANG for me. Literally. And no these are no door or pots & pans banging around. This is a bang which is made with a tiny but heavy hand and sometimes her little feet banging against my face. Maybe she thinks my face is a football and she’s probably trying to make a goal. Yes that’s my wake up call to the world of reality and it kinda ‘kickstarts’ the day for me. And as I said it’s just the beginning. As the day unfolds so does the mystery of what kind of  punch would I be receiving for the day. Yes, we have various kinds for that as well. Like the already mentioned face banging. Then we have an eye punching kind too which most of the times is literally like seeing stars in broad daylight. I wonder how she manages to break through my spec shield and reach her target bang on everytime. Ahhh! And then we have the most jaw-breaking punch in the literal sense. Her tiny little head, I’ve concluded is not hollow at all, there is a lot going on in there which probably is the only sane explanation I can come to for her heavy-headedness; if there’s such a word. So now whenever she sits on my lap I’m on high alert these days or else ‘BAAAMM…’ and we have a swollen jaw for next couple of days. Luckily, more so for my husband, that we don’t live alone or else everyone would probably be thinking that I’m abused by my husband if I show up every other day with a black eye or a swollen jaw or even a bloated face. Just imagine!

I know that once she grows a little older all this would stop and I would be jumping with relief then, yet my heart doesn’t want her to grow older, it wants to hold on. Hold on to these very moments that I’m whining about now. The truth is I am ready to be her punching bag for the rest of my life if she can just be like this forever… innocent, pure, childish, naughty and most importantly my adorable little terror!

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